So like, I have a magical story for you all. About the joys of apartment life in Melbourne. It’s a ripper, seriously.
Anyway, image you’re tired. Reaaally tired. So you go to bed. It takes a while to get to sleep but it’s niiice in bed and warm and you’re dead to the world. While in your blissfully quiet sleep world, you suddenly hear:
BEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOO EVACUATE IMMEDIATELY BEEEEOOOOOOOOOOO BEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOO
You bolt upright, COMPLETELY CONFUSED. What is happening -BEEEEOOOOOOOOOOO BEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOO- what time what who where? You run outside of your room and your parents are grumpily dressing, and you stare at them with the eyes of a lost puppy.
But they’re getting dressed to evacuate and it’s COLD outside and you’re in your pjs so you pull on some jeans that were on the floor for some reason and grab your dressing gown still completely oblivious to what is going on because a few seconds ago you were asleep and what the- BEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO - is going on and oh right evacuating.
Did I mention you live on the 16th floor? Yeah, you live on the 16th floor. So in your half awake state you stumble down SIXTEEN FLIGHTS OF STAIRS and it’s cold and about halfway the stairs all start to look flat and depth perception escapes you.
Magically you make it to the bottom unscathed and are mildly comforted by the sight of others half alseep clutching their pj’s protectively. There is also a dog. Then everyone stands around and waits for the reeeeaally displeased firemen to go up to the floor where the alarm went off and OF COURSE IT’S A FALSE ALARM.
It takes you agggesss to get back to sleep because for some reason your knee is yelling really loudly, which is odd because it hasn’t even got vocal chords.
Once you finally DO get to sleep though, you’re woken up at about 7am by WORK MEN OUTSIDE POLISHING THE GROUND. WHYYYYYY WHYYWHYWHYWHYYY.
They finish up and leave by like 9am. But it’s too late. You’re already so awake you just sit down and attempt to express your rage visually, as you’re such an artiste.
PS I’m really tired.